I'm not a freak anymore....or am I?

Talk about being a control freak. Here’s a little history about me. During my sixteen years as an army wife, I learned to be in charge. Rob was gone for weeks, months and during one deployment five weeks after our fifth child was born, even a year. I learned to be a control freak, because if I didn’t do it, there was no one else who could. But there’s something I’ve learned since my twins were born. I’ve had to give up being a control freak. I simply cannot control things they way I could before they were born, namely because I’ve chosen to exclusively breastfeed and this takes between eight and ten hours per day. It’s TOTALLY worth it to give them the best nutrition I can, but as with all good things that come to us, there are sacrifices. For instance, during a tandem nursing session, I can’t necessarily open the front door when the contractor knocks and needs me to describe the way I need the tile laid in the house we are building. I can’t stop the toddler from unrolling all of the toilet paper onto the bathroom floor, and when he’s finished with that, opening another roll and doing the same. I can’t answer the phone when it rings. When two kids are arguing, I can’t go to them to help resolve it; they have to come and stand before me as I’m nursing in order for me to mediate. And… I can’t pack the van in preparation for a three-day drive to a beach resort in Mexico. Why anyone would WANT to do that with eight kids in tow in the first place is questionable, but for some reason, John and I thought it would be a good idea. This is what our van looked like during the trip home…

I NEED HELP! During out stay in the hotel, I kept thinking that I would go down and “muck it out” as John says, but between nursing sessions, preparing food sessions and magnanimously watching the kids jump off huge rocks into the swimming pool over and over again sessions, there just wasn’t time. I felt out of control and helpless most of the time. My priorties were the twins and making sure they were fed and happy, but everything else was completely out of my control. That being said, John did an absolutely fantastic job with the rest of the responsibilities. He purchased and organized all of the food for the trip, planned the route, and during our stay, took the toddler and whoever else wanted to go for early-morning walks on the beach every day...


...organized a deep-sea fishing trip for all ten of us...


...and prepared many of the meals we ate in the hotel suite...


Overall, the trip was a success, and I will write of certain specific events that occurred in later posts, but my purpose in writing THIS post is basically as a “note to self” of how we can avoid the chaos in the van as pictured above. I always tell myself that I am going to record what went wrong during any given trip and how I can improve things for the future, but I never seem to get around to it. Now that I’m a blogger, however, this will be the perfect forum in which to do this. The following ideas will take a great deal of preparation on my part, but as the twins will be starting solid food in two days, I believe I will have the time I need to prepare properly. This is what I’m going to do differently:

1. The van will be completely cleaned out and vacuumed before we leave for our trip. I know, common sense would dictate that that be done, but in our case it wasn’t.

2. Each child will have their own small backpack, including the toddler (for which an older child will be responsible), in which will be placed notepads, waterproof markers, pens, books and any other small toys we, as the parents, deem appropriate.

3. Each child will have a small blanket and throw pillow. I, in my control-freakish nature, will be responsible for these objects when not traveling. They will be under my protection and never to be used in the home, ONLY for traveling.

4. There will be ABSOLUTELY NO EATING IN THE VAN! Each child may have their own water bottle with a sports top, but absolutely nothing else. Ground in Subway tomatoes in the carpet does not make for a comfortable foot area.


5. All snacks and lunches will be prepared ahead of time and packaged individually. Gone will be the days of having to haul huge laundry baskets and ice chests full of food out of the van at each rest stop. The kids will help in this preparation so as to be accountable for what goes into their snack packs and lunches, hopefully avoiding the disappointed stares as they open their brown paper bags.

6. Each child will be given a plastic grocery bag to contain any trash that might accumulate on the road. These bags will be emptied into the gas station garbage cans each time we fill up.

There…a very idealistic look at what my next trip will be like.

Now, let me ask you this: What do YOU do to make traveling with kids easier? Please feel free to post your comments and share your wisdom. I would especially love to hear from new visitors to this blog! The more, the merrier!

This post is listed at We Are THAT Family, a very funny blog hosted by an awesome lady, and ...

The Lazy Organizer's "Talk About Tuesday". This is an awesome site that will get you out of the clutter closet!


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