Thursday, November 3, 2011

PMS and the 48-Hour Rule

So I'm 41 years old, and only within the last year did I discover I have PMS. I believe my dear husband could have informed me, but I think he knew better.

Recently I've read two fascinating books called The Male Brainand The Female Brainby Louann Brizendine. Believe it or not, the book about the male brain is actually longer than a small pamphlet. It was actual book size, and it was fascinating to read about the hormonal changes a male brain goes through from the fetal stage to the grandfather stage. It helped me accept why my four 5 and under are constantly on the go, competing, fighting and yelling...,


I also realized why my 15-year-old doesn't want to do his school work, and why homework is not even on his top ten list of things to do. And to illustrate how accepting I've become of my boys' brains' chemical makeups, while my mother and I were rebounding for the 16-year-old girl as she made her 300 shots for basketball practice, the 15- and 11-year-old boys started wrestling on the cement. They were grunting and sometimes yelling and the 11-year-old boy's face was red and grimacing, but showing no signs of surrender and the 15-year-old boy was panting and laughing. I stood over them as they writhed to and fro, and, calling across the court to my mother, I said, "See mother? This is healthy and normal!" and I continued rebounding as the boys continued to fight for the alpha male position.

The real revelations came, however, after studying the female brain. I learned why my girls spoke sooner than the boys did (because their communication centers are nearly twice as big as those of boys), why they're innately more nurturing...

...why the 16-year-old girl is giggly/bubbly happy one hour and raging mad the next and sometimes a little selfish, and I learned what happens in my brain a week before my period starts.

It turns out that chemical reactions in my brain create hormones that make it difficult for me to handle everyday disappointments and disillusionments . . . like today. Over the past two days I have become offended on a number of occasions. My innate reaction would normally be to bring the offense to the offender's attention. This practice usually ends with negative results. After reading The Female Brain, however, I discovered the PMS 48-hour rule. To follow this rule one must not act on urges to vent feelings of anger or hurt that occur during PMS until 48 hours have passed. If after this time lapse, the feelings remain strong and the need to voice ones concerns persists, then the issue can be further considered.

I believe that by following this rule today, I have avoided embarrassment, further resentment, and hurting friends, family, and loved ones. As I discussed my new plan with a good friend today, she said she's going to try it, too, which statement prompted me to share this portion of my vast wisdom with you today. You're welcome.

Thanks for listening!

Oh, and P.S. If you feel like you could perhaps be one of the offending parties, please do not ask me to confirm or allay your fears because the 48-hour time frame has not expired. :)


Anonymous said...

Got it! I won't ask and I'll have my 'walking on ice gear' on this weekend.
Thanks for the heads up - you are so sweet and thoughtful.
Love you, ME

Bethany said...

Glad you liked the books...YOU'RE WELCOME for sharing a portion of MY vast knowledge.

Mom2my10 @ 11th Heaven said...

Haha, Beth, yes, Thank you! I really enjoyed them. I love it when someone recommends a great book!

Anonymous said...

PMS is drastically improved with a clean liver. Since all emotions are hormones and therefore chemicals. All chemicals are filtered in the liver. If the liver is congested, it cannot remove excess hormones. When PMS dumps new chemicals, the system is overwhelmed.
Garlic, legumes, onions. pears, oats, apples, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, artichokes, beets, carrots, dandelion, milk thistle, turmeric, and cinnamon are good choices for liver health. Dr. Christopher's formulas in this order help tremendously: Lower bowel continue throughout cleanse, followed by kidney for 3-4 weeks, followed by liver/gallbladder for 3-4 weeks, followed by blood stream for 3-4 weeks.

Trisha said...

Thanks for reminding me about those 300 shots they have to make for Coach Robinson. That brought back alot of memories, some not so good ones! I do miss that part of my life sometimes.

Rebecca said...

The book "Why Gender Matters" by Leonard Sax was an eye opener for me. I recommend that if you are interested in learning about the innate differences between boys and girls. Its a lot longer than a pamphlet though!

Melinda said...

WOW very interesting. I will have to check them out! I dont have PMS anymore but when I did even my boys knew what time of the month it was....LOL

Jewelry Rockstar said...

I do have PMS and I've convinced myself that it has a purpose. Imagine all month long family members and others taking advantage of my reasonable requests. Going about acting very nonchalant about the rules of the house, homework, or whatever Moms try to manage at home. Then magically, one fine week comes along and the fam gets wide-eyed because my response to normal misbehaving is drastically different. It keeps them in line. Keeps them with a healthy fear, and keeps everything in the house balanced.