Tuesday, January 20, 2009

What DOESN'T Work For Me Wednesday and Watery Wednesday

Here's what DOESN'T...



...making homemade teething biscuits.


In my ongoing efforts to keep hydrogenated oils away from my children, I have gone the route of attempting to make many items I would normally purchase at the grocery store from scratch. I've had good success at some of my attempts, such as my homemade whole wheat rolls, homemade pancakes, and homemade cookies, but I have apparently come upon something that was destined for failure. I couldn't bear the thought of buying Gerber teething biscuits, as many of their baby food ingredients are some of the poisons from which I am trying to protect my family, such a high fructose corn syrup and partially-hydrogenated oil. I know I probably sound like a nutcase, but after feeding them nothing but breast milk for so long, I simply did not want to pollute their little growing bodies with the filth the passes for food in the United States. Okay, I'll calm down now.

Anyway...I searched for a recipe for homemade teething biscuits and came across one with only four wholesome ingredients. I whipped up a batch, put them in the oven and waited. I had even cut them into fun star shapes, because it was right before Christmas, and if things went well, I was going to package them up in cute bags and give them to Joseph and Hyrum's amigos for Christmas. After I had removed them from the oven and let them cool down, I noticed that they were very hard, but figured hey, they're teething biscuits, they're supposed to be. I enthusiastically handed one to each twin and they proceeded to stare, then throw them on the floor. I followed the three-second rule, picked them up to try to give them to them again, but it was like they didn't even register that it was food. Normally every...single...item... goes into their mouths, but they wouldn't put the cookies near them. I tried a few times again that evening, but to no avail.

The next day, because I'm not one to give up, I decided to make another batch, but this time I would apply a light sugar and egg glaze before baking to give it just enough of a sweet touch for them to want to continue to gnaw on them. The results? Similar to the above description. At least the biscuits ventured into them mouths this time, but they were so hard, the babies had much more fun throwing them onto the slate floor over and over again rather than chewing on them...

The last idea I came up with to try to get them to like these ridiculous biscuits was to let them eat them in the bath. Gross? Perhaps, but, like I said, I'm not one to give up. I figured at least the water would soften them up a little bit. Here's what one looked like directly after giving it to a twin...


Here is Hyrum's enthusiastic expression at the thought of having to try this biscuit yet another time...


(The food on his face is the result of his dinner and has nothing to do with the biscuits.)

And here are the biscuits after twenty minutes in the tub...


Perhaps this gives you a vague idea of how hard these biscuits really were.

Hey...anybody out there have a teething biscuit recipe? Joseph and Hyrum would really like to know. Thanks for listening!

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12 comments:

Mrs. D said...

Well, it's better than the typical floaty one sometimes finds in the tub! I wish I could tell you I have a recipe for a teething biscuit, but I don't!

FeeBeeKay said...

Hi there - I am sorry but I am not a great baker, but I share your desire to make sure my little one only eats 'good food' where I can. One thing I did was put banana in the deep freeze for a few hours. I cut it into fist size chunks and put them in a plastic container so they keep for at least a month this way. When needed I can give my teeny weeny one and she will happily gnaw away at it. Only thing is you need to watch that she doesn't try to rub it into her hair as it begins to thaw and soften! She's apt to get creative with her food! Hope this helps!

Blessings to you all

FeeBeeKay

The Southern Housewife said...

Oh my goodness, that post had me laughing! poor you and your biscuits!!! :( You were only trying to do what's right for your fam and you get a rotten recipe :( I just love the face on your baby!! "Ummmm....mama, how about YOU eat it?!"

Bobbi Jo said...

Mom2 9,
This sounds crazy but try refrigerated, peeled and cleaned onions. Most babies love these. Odd but true. Hugs, Bobbi Jo

Melinda said...

Funny post. How good for you to try to keep your cuties healthy. I wish I could help you. Love the look on his face.... :)

newlyweds said...

Ha, that is so funny. I made my twins these zucchini teething biscuits and they loved them. I have posted this recipe on my blog. Here is the link

http://newlyweds.wordpress.com/2008/08/12/homemade-baby-teething-sticks/

Amanda B. said...

This was pretty funny. I guess I couldn't help but wonder why you don't want them to have hydrogenated oils, yet the body scum in there bathwater was okay...kind of made me laugh, but I guess you didn't have to worry about that. I agree with "Mrs D"- better than the usual floaties! :) Thanks for the smile today!

Mom2my9 said...

Good point, Amanda! I guess I know the body scum will get filtered out, but it might take years for the hydrogenated oil to do the same! And true, better than the usual floaties. It turns out that I didn't have to worry about it after all as they wouldn't let the biscuits get near their mouths!

L2L said...

I never did the teether biscuits as I was always nervous that they would suck a piece off and choke on it, so what I did was wet a wash cloth, wring it out, and then freeze it. Each one of my children enjoyed that!!!!!

momelo said...

This was so funny! :)
it happened to me with a new bread recipe, it came out so hard I couldn't even break it to feed the birds! :)

Mrs. Mordecai said...

That is so funny! How about biscotti? They're fairly hard but still edible.

Karen said...

LOL... that had me smiling :-)

My twins are now grown up, but when they and their siblings were teething, I used to slice homemade bread into thick fingers and toast they till they were hard in the oven. Worked well for me and them..

Sweet photos of your little cuties :-)