Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Fear of Commitment

....not when it comes to a husband, or kids, but going on a diet. I'm finally going to do it.

Here is my life story at five foot eight, no holds barred, when it comes to weight:

Marriage to Rob - 125 lbs (model thin)

After Bethany was born - lost all but five pounds, so up to 130 (still looking good)

After Conor was born - lost all but five pounds, so up to 135 (still pretty good)

After Kyla was born - lost all but five pounds, so up to 140 (not too bad for having three kids)

After Reid was born - lost all but five pounds, so up to 145 (not too bad for having four kids)

After Landon was born - lost all the weight, so still at 145 (looking good)

After Claire was born - lost all but five pounds, so up to 150 (kind of starting to get annoyed)

Met John - went out to eat at least three times a week, so by the time we got married five weeks later, I was up to 160 (really depressed because I had to take back the first wedding dress I had purchased in exchange for a larger one!)

After returning from honeymoon in Cancun - 165 (even more depressed now)

After Johnny was born - lost all but 9 pounds, so up to 174 (figured I'd lose it eventually)

After twins were born - lost all but four pounds in five weeks, so now up to 178 (thrilled that I had lost 38 pounds in four weeks eating whatever I wanted!)

Continued eating whatever I wanted - gained 11 pounds and reached an astonishing 189 pounds!! (Aarrrgh!)

So I've started a diet. It's not a diet where I count every calorie or carb gram, just one where I don't eat four large bowls of chocolate ice cream every day. I might even start exercising. I'm still nursing the twins, so I have to make sure I get enough calories, just not so much that the excess goes to my hips and thighs and under my chin. I'm blogging this because I want to be accountable to you and I know you'll give me the encouragement I need. Since I began my diet, I have lost five pounds, so I'm on my way to success. Here is a picture of my current self. I'm not proud of it, but let's just call it my before picture. Wish me luck!


Unknown said...

if you are not going to eat the ice cream, can I have it? Good luck!!

Anonymous said...

You go girl! Just remember that I think you are beautiful just as you are & I love you for who you are & not for how your looks may change! Besides, I think it will be exciting to see what you look like at your ideal weight & me with a full head of hair in the next life!

Troy the Marathon Man said... have no idea how much blogging helps me run. I feel accountable to you guys and that really helps motivate me to get out there to run....hopefully it will do the same for you on your diet. Good luck!

Amanda said...

Okay Jen, I am trying to lose 17 lbs. I just haven't been brave enough to blog about it yet. Talk about fear of commitment. Let me know if you come up with some fabulous secret. I just need to wean this baby first.......

Bobbi said...

Go Jen! You are so brave! I think I have the same timeline, only make my 10 for each one instead of 5! Count your blessings!

BarbaraJo said...

Good for you.We can all mentor each other. Keep track by inches...not is nicer.

How are you feeling? Are you healing? We've been out of town for a few days. Let me know if you need anything...or want to practice.

laurice. said...

Ok you are so brave to put that on! Good luck I hate diets! By the way I think you look good just the way you are!

C said...

I think your "before" picture is too cute to be a before picture!!

I hope you're doing better!!

If you're ditching the ice cream, does this mean you'll come over and eat chocolate covered bluberries with me? They're full of antioxidants you know....

:-) C

Elder Romney's mission said...

Alright Jen, exercise class MWF 8:30 bring all your kids we do!! I still think you look great now though!!

Kristin said...

Oh Jen, your openess is astonishing! Ditto to everything nice that was said before. I honestly think you are pretty no matter what.

The Farmer's Wife said...

You are a doll Jen! Good luck...share your recipes as you go!

Anonymous said...

I feel your pain. Only I lost all my baby weight and gained when I met all my tx friends. still fighting with it. love you and you are still beautiful!

Amanda B. said...

I feel your pain on this one. I am also 5'8'' and approximately 160 lbs and proud of it. I actually topped out (before my oldest was born) at 259 lbs. I lost some on my own, but after the twins were born, I was nursing twins, but starting to gain it back- that tells you how bad I was eating if I can nurse twins and gain weight! I was back up to about 220 (before twins, I was 200ish). So, I joined weight watchers and am down in the 160's. It is such a struggle. Nursing twins definitely helped though. Like you said, I had to eat a good amount of food to be sure I got enough calories to make milk. But really, all it took was just a little control and the weight just fell off. So, it was a good time to "diet." I could still eat a lot, just took out the worst stuff, and I was able to lose weight. Don't worry too much though- you look great in the pictures you posted! I am just glad you are feeling better after the infection! Yikes!

CJ, The Purple Diva said...

Kudos to you!
Loved your life story in weight! I would be afraid to write mine! LOL